Living in a dysfunctional family can be hard, extremely hard. Constantly witnessing fights, being dragged in negativity, surrounded by angry and depressed people is not easy. Chances are you yourself lose your cool and, there are times when you feel completely lost. Yes, it happens! Researchers say that a large percentile of families across the globe are dysfunctional! So, you are not alone.
Just knowing that there is a way out and believing in yourself can help. Life is a combination of happiness and pain. Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. No matter how much we blame our outer circumstances, it is our inner self that can help us heal. We create our own happiness and it is only our responsibility to keep ourselves happy. These tried and tested ways will help you deal with challenging family members and lessen your stress levels.
Create your happy space:
Okay. So, living in a house with full of angry and depressed people is a challenging task. (pardon my harsh words) It saddens you and drains all your energy without even you doing much. If you are stuck in such a situation, please don’t lose hope. The first thing you should do is create your happy space. If you have a room then, you don’t know how lucky you are! You can convert it into a happy space. Stick pictures of things or people you like and decorate it with positivity.
“Creating your happy space” just means making a place in your house where you actually feel good. Just being in that place should remind you to stay calm and uplift your mood. It need not necessarily be a room. It can be a wall, any small area, your back yard or even your bathroom. Just that, the place should remind you that you are lucky, happy and strong.
Stand up for yourself:
Standing up for yourself when you feel no one is by your side. Be your best friend. Be on the same page with yourself! Don’t run away from people or situations, rather accept them. I am still learning this process. I know, it’s easier said than done but, embracing the situation and finding a solution is the right thing to do. Being stable in the mind helps you to take a right decision which is the most important thing! Feeling left out and not being loved is probably the worst feeling of this world. But, rather than sympathising yourself or expecting someone to do something for you, it will be great if you get up, stand tall and do something for yourself.
Define your goals, ambition, and dreams:
Have goals in life and aim for the sky. Be the person you always wanted to be. Take responsibility for your life. Be strong emotionally, physically and financially! Because you deserve the best! Nothing in this world is worth giving up your smile for, quotes Global Humanitarian Leader Sri Sri Ravi Shankar. Smile at the world and let it smile back at you! 🙂
Most importantly, feel grateful for what you have received and let positivity flow in. Remember, Life is meant to be abundant in all areas!
Take out time and improve yourself. Practice some yoga, asanas, and pranayamas. Learn some breathing techniques and meditation which has great power to heal physical, mental and emotional stress. Meditation calms your mind and renders clarity of thought. Channelizing our energy to positive things is the way. While dealing with tough situations, most people indulge in alcohol and other alarming things which indeed create more problems. So, be intelligent enough to at least not increase your issues by giving up into these things.
Win hearts with love, compassion, and patience:
On a serious note, in all the above steps, we focused on ourselves. Because we cannot change other people’s behaviour or the situations around us. All we can do is decide how we react to them. It is not in our hands how people are be it our loved ones, expecting them to change is crazy. But, we can change ourselves, we can chose to handle our mind, our life if not anything else. This is what I have learned so far. But, that does not mean we totally disgrace our loved ones, no, it does not mean that.
It only means learning to keep calm, be happy in tough times, in difficult situations first. We love our family and hence, we need to deal with them with love, compassion and lots of patience. Because, change does not happen overnight. Mending relationships can take days, months and even years. But, if you really wish to hold on to it then it will surely happen.
After you have strengthened yourself then you can try the following steps to bridge the gap.
- Focus on the good qualities of the person or your dysfunctional family members you are troubled with.
- Compliment them.
- Keep the conversations light.
- Avoid distressful situations; surround yourself with good thoughts as much as possible.
- Take a Meditation Workshop together.
They say…The world is a reflection of your own self! So it is very important for you to be happy and feel good about yourself. Do not let anyone tell you that you are not good enough. Be a nice person and attract positivity! Situations exist, be it being a dysfunctional family or something else, it is our own decisions that make or break our life.
Do comment below if you think the same and if these tips were helpful or have some useful other ways. Do a random act of kindness and share this article with the person you think may be benefited from it.
You can checkout: 10 easy ways to uplift your mood!
Also see: Links to FREE Online Guided Meditations
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